CLARA VAUGHAN
A NOVEL
IN THREE VOLUMES
VOL II.
R. D. Blackmore
London and Cambridge:
MACMILLAN AND CO.
1864.
The Right of Translation and Reproduction is reserved.
LONDON:
R. CLAY, SON, AND TAYLOR, PRINTERS,
BREAD STREET HILL.
CLARA VAUGHAN
BOOK II. (continued).
CHAPTER XVII.
Late in the evening of that same day, I sat in myroom by the firelight only (for I could not work) andtried to look into myself, and find out the cause of mystrange attraction or rather impulsion towards Isola.Somehow or other I did not wonder so much that sheshould be drawn quite as strongly towards me, althoughan impartial observer would perhaps have wondered farmore. Alter puzzling myself in vain with this inquiry,my thoughts began to move, in their usual gloomy train.
Eight years had now elapsed, and what had Idiscovered? Nothing; but at long dark intervals someimpress of the deed itself, more than of the doer. HadI halted in pursuit, or had my vengeance cooled? Tothe former question my conscience answered "yes," tothe latter "no." Gentle influences had been shedaround me, sorrow had bedewed the track of hate,intercourse with happy harmless people, and gratitude forunmerited kindness; it was not in human nature, howeverfinely constitute for evil, entirely to repulse these powers.
I could not deny, that the religion of my heart,during the last twelvemonth, had been somewhatneglected. For my devotion to dear mother, no pleawas required. But the time since that, what businesshad I with laughing children, and snug firesides, withdickybirds, and Sandy the squirrel? Even sweet Isolacaused me a pang of remorse; but no, I could not quiteabandon her. But now, thank God, I was in the rightroad again, and plodding resolutely as my father couldexpect. To his spirit, ever present with me, I kneltdown and poured out my remorse; and swore to makeamends, whatever it might cost me. Yet even then, agentle shadow seemed to come as well, and whisper thewords that calmed the face of death.
My musings, if so mild a word may suit them, wereroughly interrupted by a loud step on the stairs.Inspector Cutting, who could walk when needful li