Punch, or the London Charivari
Volume 98, May 31st 1890
edited by Sir Francis Burnand
VOCES POPULI.
IN THE MALL ON DRAWING-ROOM DAY.
The line of carriages bound for Buckingham Palace is moving byslow stages down the Drive. A curious but not uncritical crowd,consisting largely of females, peer into the carriages as they pass,and derive an occult pleasure from a glimpse of a satin train anda bouquet. Other spectators circulate behind them, roving fromcarriage to carriage, straining and staring in at the occupantswith the childlike interest of South Sea Islanders. The coachmenand footmen gaze impassively before them, ignoring thecrowd to the best of their ability. The ladies in the carriagesbear the ordeal of popular inspection with either haughtyresignation, elaborate unconsciousness, or amused tolerance, andit is difficult to say which demeanour provokes the greatestresentment in the democratic breast.
Chorus of Female Spectators. We shall see better here than whatwe did last Droring-Room. Law, 'ow it did come down, too, pouringthe 'ole day. I was that sorry for the poor 'orses!... Oh, that onewas nice, Marire! Did you see 'er train?—all flame-colouredsatting—lovely!Ain't them flowers beautiful? Oh, Liza, 'ere's a poreskinny-lookin' thing coming next—lookat 'er pore dear arms, allbare! But dressed 'andsomeenough.... That's a Gineral inthere, see? He's 'olding hiscocked 'at on his knee to save thefeathers—him and her have been'aving words, apparently ... Oh,I do like this one. I s'pose that'sher Mother with her—well, yes,o' course it may be her Aunt?
EXCHANGE NO ROBBERY.
A Sardonic Loafer. 'Ullo, 'ere'sa 'aughty one! layin' back andputtin' up 'er glorses! Know usagen, Mum, won't you? Youmay well look—you ain't seen somuch in yer ole life as whatyou're seein' to-day, I'll lay!Ah, you ought to feel honoured,too, all of us comin' out to lookat yer. Drored 'er blind down,this one 'as, yer see—knew shewasn't wuth looking at!
[A carriage passes; the footmanon the box is adorned by anenormous nosegay, over whichhe can just see.
First Comic Cockney. Ow, Is'y—you 'ave come out in bloom,Johnny!
Second C. C. Ah, they've binforcin' 'im under glorse, they'ave!'Is Missis 'll never find 'im underall them flowers. Ow, 'e smoiledat me through the brornches!
[Another carriage passes, thecoachman and footmen ofwhich are undecorated.
First C. C. Shime!—they mightha' stood yer a penny bunch o' voilets between yer, that they might!
The Sardonic L. 'Ere 's a swell turn-out and no mistake—with acouple o' bloomin' beadles standin' be'ind! There's a full-fed 'uninside of it too,—look at the dimonds all over 'er bloomin' old nut.My eye! (The elderly dowager inside produces a cut-glass scent-bottleof goodly size.) Ah, she's got a drop o' the right sort in there—seeher sniffin at it—it won't take 'er long to mop up tha