"After all," asks a writer, "whyshouldn't Ireland have a Parliament, likeEngland?" Quite frankly we do notlike this idea of retaliation while morehumane methods are still unexplored.
"The miners' strike," says a music-halljournal, "has given one song-writerthe idea for a ragtime song." It is onlyfair to say that Mr. Smillie had no ideathat his innocent little manœuvre wouldlead to this.
The Admiralty does not propose topublish an official account of the Battleof Jutland. Indeed the impression isgaining ground that this battle willhave to be cancelled.
We are asked to denythat, following upon thepublication of Mirrors ofDowning Street, by "AGentleman with a Duster,"Lord Kenyon is about todedicate to Sir ClaudeChampion de Crespignya book entitled A Peer witha Knuckle-Duster.
"Mr. Lloyd George seemsto have had his hair 'bobbed'recently," says agossip-writer in a Sundaypaper. Mr. Hodges stillsticks to the impressionthat it was really two-bobbed.
"Cigars discovered inthe possession of EdwardFischer, in New York," says a newsitem, "were found to contain onlytobacco." Very rarely do we comeacross a case like that in England.
"Water," says a member of theL.C.C., "is being sold at a loss." Butnot in our whisky, we regret to say.
What is claimed to be the largestshell ever made has been turned out bythe Hecla Works, Sheffield. It mayshortly be measured for a war to fit it.
A taxi-driver who knocked a mandown in Gracechurch Street has summonedhim for using abusive language.It seems a pity that pedestrians cannotbe knocked down without showing theirtemper like this.
After months of experiment at ThamesDitton the question of an artificial limbof light metal has been solved. It issaid to be just the thing for Tube-travellersto carry as a spare.
In connection with Mr. Pringle'srecent visit to Ireland we are asked tosay that he was not sent there as areprisal.
Mr. George Lansbury recently tolda Poplar audience why he went toAustralia many years ago. No explanationwas offered of his return.
A coal-porter summoned for income-taxat West Ham Police Court saidthat his wages averaged eight hundredpounds a year. We think it only fairto say that there must be labouringmen here and there who earn even lessthan that.
"The thief," says a weekly paperreport, "entered the house by way ofthe front-door." We can only supposethat the burglars' entrance was lockedat the time.
A small boy, born in a Turkish harem,is said to have forty-eight step-mothersliving. Our office-boy, however, is stillundefeated in the matter of recentlydefunct grandmothers.
The number of accidental deaths inFrance is attaining alarming proportions.It is certainly time that a stopwas put to the quaint custom of duelling.
A rat that looks like a kangaroo andbarks like a prairie dog is reported inTexas, says The Columbia Record. Wecan only say that, when we last heardthat one, it was an elephant with whitetrunk and pink eyes.
"Why do leaders of